This is a surprise...

I'm not lonely. I'm home alone, just me and the dogs and most of the time when that happens I am very lonely. It's just that I feel so close to my Lord right now. I feel his presence in my life so strongly right now that I'm not bothered by the fact that no one else is with me. I even chose to take something out of the freezer for lunch (yum, homemade taco soup...lol...my favorite food lately), rather than finding someone to go out to lunch with me.

I even had no trouble getting to sleep last night. There was no fear...and this scripture says it all:

"I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, Oh Lord, make me dwell in safety." Psalm 4:8

For so many years, fear completely ruled my life. And so I praise him continually, the one who relieved me of my fears and taught me that He alone is to be feared.

I love the Christian song "I'm not who I was" by Brandon Heath that says:

I wish you could see me now

I wish I could show you how

I'm not who I was...

I am truly not who I was before 2003 (the year I finally gave up control of my life to the Lord...lol...like I ever had it in the first place!). There is no way I can prove it to you, although my actions may serve as evidence. All I can really do is witness to what my life is now compared to what it was before.

It's In The Valleys That We Grow

My name is Suzanne and the meaning of my name is "lily of the valley". I've been through many deep valleys in my life, but I've also been on the mountain tops (figuratively, if not literally). I hope and pray that I can be a "lily" to the people I encounter, to brighten the lives of others even in a small way. I try not to give myself the credit for any time that I have touched a life for the better. I strive to give all the credit to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, without whom I am nothing.

I am 42, soon to be 43, years old and I have definitely led an interesting life so far. I've experienced more bad things in my life than most, yet I don't really consider them bad things any more. What I have been through has shaped who I am and I wouldn't want to be anyone else. However, I do still struggle at times. It's just that now I truly know that the Lord will bring me through whatever difficulties I face.

A few years ago, I worked through a bible study called "Making Peace With Your Past" and in the course of the study, one of the other participants read the following poem. It touched me in such a special way. I hope it will touch those who read it here as well.

Sometimes life seems hard to bear,

Full of sorrow, trouble and woe

It's then I have to remember

That it's in the valleys I grow.

If I always stayed on the mountain top

And never experienced pain,

I would never appreciate God's love

And would be living in vain.

I have so much to learn

And my growth is very slow,

Sometimes I need the mountain tops,

But it's in the valleys I grow.

I do not always understand

Why things happen as they do,

But I am very sure of one thing.

My Lord will see me through.

My little valleys are nothing

When I picture Christ on the cross

He went through the valley of death;

His victory was Satan's loss.

Forgive me Lord, for complaining

When I'm feeling so very low.

Just give me a gentle reminder

That it's in the valleys I grow.

Continue to strengthen me, Lord

And use my life each day

To share your love with others

And help them find their way.

Thank you for valleys, Lord

For this one thing I know

The mountain tops are glorious

But it's in the valleys I grow!