Just had to pop in and say..

Things are getting better around here. I've put my focus a little more on God and how he's blessed me, and a little less on what my problems are. I thank you all for your prayers and kind words. They mean so very much to me.

It also doesn't hurt that D starts a new job on Monday!!! At the old job, he was hired to do one job and ended up being put into something entirely different. I'm really hopeful that he'll be in a better mood now that his situation is changing. The new job should be a MUCH better fit for him. He will be working with a good friend of his and so he already knows a little bit about how the company works.

The only bad thing is that D was unable to give two weeks notice for various reasons. He's never had to leave a job abruptly like this, so this is very awkward for him. He also has a feeling of failure regarding this job, even though he logically knows that it wasn't his fault. Please take time to say a prayer for him.

Feeling blessed...

There, that's better...

I just had to have another blog background. The other one was nice, just not for me...and since Gretchen had to steal the one I really wanted, this'll do. :)

Pure Joy?

I have never read the book called "The Road Less Traveled", but from what I hear, it is a great book. I started to read it once, and I remember that it begins with a profound statement, "Life is difficult". Sometimes I think we get it into our heads that life should be easier. Why do we think that way?

We definitely aren't promised in The Bible that our lives will be easy. In fact, we are told that our lives here on earth may be quite precarious. However, we are told that we should "consider it pure joy" when we face trials, that it develops perseverance (James 1:2-3). What's up with that? Pure joy???


How many of us consider it pure joy to go through tough times? I know I don't. I have a tendency to whine and complain. Sometimes I can let one little thing knock the wind out of my sails. If I don't do a self check and remind myself of what truly matters, I can find myself dwelling on all that's wrong in my life. I sometimes forget how truly blessed I am.



Maybe I should take a cue from my friend Gretchen who does Glatitude Mondays (love those so much Gretchen!!). I need to be focusing on what's right in my life, not what's wrong. So here goes:

1. I have had enough money to pay my bills for some time now. Praise God, I'm blessed to know how great that is since I've experienced times when I struggled so hard to pay them.

2. I don't have to worry about being too hot or too cold in my home as I have A/C and heating that works fine. I experienced times in my life when I didn't have those.

3. My children have never had trouble passing the TAKS Test in school, which can determine whether a child moves on to the next grade. I have seen so many anxious kids work and work to pass it and still fail.

4. I have friends who care about me and encourage me.

5. I have relatively good health.

6. I have a husband who loves me.

7. I have 3 great kids, including an amazing adult daughter who is also a friend.

8. I love my job!

9. I go to a wonderful church.

10. I have a God who loved me enough to send His Son to die for my sins.

Counting my blessings...

If you don't have something nice to say...

You know the old phrase, "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all"? Well I guess that has been the theme of my blog here lately. I've been going through a rough time lately and I really don't like to complain all the time, so I've just said nothing. Pretty much the only place I've felt good lately is at work. I really love my job, difficult as it can be, and it has been a respite from what's been going on in my home life.



I know that raising teenagers is a challenge for everyone, and I know that this time will pass. I also know I'll miss my kids terribly when they are no longer in my home, but wow I'm tired of this time right now. I hate that I feel like that.



Things have also been a strain in my marriage. My husband HATES his job and has not been very pleasant to be around for quite some time. Plus, last Tuesday was our 25th anniversary and he did absolutely nothing special to note the occasion. We went out to dinner, but just to a place that is very ordinary for us. And it's not like he didn't know it was important to me that we do something...anything...



I let my husband know I was terribly upset (twice over the course of a few days) about the fact that he doesn't seem to have a romantic bone in his body and that it makes me feel like I'm taken for granted. It honestly makes me wonder how much he really cares about me. He sent me flowers yesterday (6 days after our anniversary), so that's something I guess....



My house is also a complete disaster. I have never been able to get into a routine since I went back to work last year. Since I was a stay-at-home mom for so many years, my kids got used to me doing most things for them. Now that I'm working full time I am SO tired when I get home and can't seem to find the energy to do anything but sit, especially if I go to the effort to actually cook something for dinner.



All of this makes me feel like such a whiner and I am I guess, but it's how I feel. Yes, I do know that there are others out there who have so much more to deal with...I know it could be so much worse. I just want to get back to a place where things don't feel so difficult.

I started this post yesterday and I guess I just needed to get a new perspective. Last night I had a good, long conversation with my mom (that is a blessing in and of itself). We're both going through a couple of things that are similar and I started out talking about how bad things were back in 2002-2004 for me. When I looked back at how difficult things were then (severe depression), I began to see that this time in my life isn't nearly as bad.

I began to realize just how blessed I am, even in the midst of a new difficult time. I don't have the anxiety I had, nor the frequency of panic attacks (now they are very few and far between). I trust God that He does have a purpose for my troubled times even though I stray from his plan for me sometimes. I know that my life is far better now that I do have His peace.

Now I just need to learn to be a little more patient when times are tough and wait for the new mountaintops that will come. Trusting in Him better today...God bless you all!

The Oklahoma Trip

Things didn't start out as good as I planned. I felt the first scratchiness in my throat Thursday night and by Friday afternoon, my voice was gone and my sinuses were terribly congested. So while I had intended on talking more than listening, it was a listening kind of weekend for me. It was very frustrating for me, since I love to talk more than most anybody, but I still had fun.

When we first got to Seminole, we decided to go visit Pam's dad in the nursing home. My heart broke when I realized that I couldn't hug him since I was afraid I had a cold and certainly didn't want to pass it on to him. As sick as he is, I doubt I will have a chance to see him again, so I am glad we went. It was so hard to see him like that though.

Friday night Pam's brother Eddie made us the most amazing pizza with pepperoni, sausage and jalapenos! Yummm! We sat around and talked and laughed. I was able to get myself to go to bed much earlier than usual (most times we stay up till 2:00 or 3:00am and then get up at 7:00) since I wasn't feeling that well and really needed the sleep.

The next morning we drove 2 hours to Tulsa to do our "shopping"...there actually wasn't much shopping going on (as I had expected). At lunch time we decided on Mexican food (love it!), and I got to sit next to my favorite Oklahoma sister, Annie. Then we went to the mall for more shopping.

That evening we found out that sister Lisa's teenage son had an infection in his hand (back in Seminole) and needed to go to the E.R. As a result, it looked like we would have to go back to Seminole rather than stay at the hotel with the other girls. Thankfully, we got word a little while later that the doctors said that Lisa's son was going to be ok, so we decided it would be alright to stay in Tulsa for the night.

I was thrilled to get to spend more time with the group that had already spent the night before in Tulsa. While I didn't get to have much actual conversation with them, it was still fun to hang out and listen to their stories. We were laughing so loudly in the hotel room that I was afraid someone would complain, but thankfully no one did.

Sunday we headed back to Seminole, said goodbye to the ones that were there, and headed back to Dallas. We all made it back safely and I'm glad we were able to make our trip again. I look forward to next year and hope that then I will stay well enough to TALK.

4 More Days!!!

Only 4 more days till I leave for my girls' weekend! This will be year 18 for me. Every year my best friend Pam (and sometimes another friend) and I travel to Oklahoma for our yearly shopping trip. So I've asked for Friday off from work, as have Pam and another friend, Maria. And while everyone else is slaving away at work, we will be driving and talking and talking some more.



First we travel to tiny little Seminole, Oklahoma to see Pam's mom, dad and siblings. Pam is one of 18 children (yes, you read right, 18!). She has 10 sisters and 7 brothers. And I just can't even express how much I love all of them. They have "adopted" me into their family (what's one more, huh?) and have been such a blessing in my life. Pam's dad is so special to me that I even named my son after him (T's middle name). And her mom is one of the kindest and most gentle women I have ever known in my life. I have never met people quite like her family.



Friday night we have plans to hang out and play games with some of my favorite siblings. I'm sure we'll stay up way too late, but we always have SO much fun. I can hear Pam's brother Danny (who truly is more an uncle to my kids than my own brother) laughing even as I think about it. Her brother Eddie is supposed to make us his famous homemade pizza (yum!). Lisa will also be there and she always brings life to the party as well. Lisa might even bring along her kiddos who I dearly love.



Some of the girls (Pam's sisters and maybe a niece or two) are planning to stay in Tulsa at a hotel on Friday night while we are in Seminole. Saturday morning Pam, Maria, Lisa and I will load up and drive to Tulsa (about a 2 hour drive) for the shopping!!! Well of course the shopping isn't the part that is most fun. Seeing the rest of the girls is! I haven't heard who all is going to be there yet, but there are about 4 who never miss the trip. I can't wait to get my hugs from Annie, Mary, Patti and Kathleen!



Once in Tulsa, we will shop till we drop and we will no doubt shock some waitress at lunch with the size of our group. Most fun of all, once the shopping is done, we are planning to stay at the hotel with the other girls Saturday night for a slumber part of sorts. We have always wanted to do this, but it's never really worked out before and we've always driven the two hours back to Seminole after shopping. Even as tired as we always are, the drive has always been fun because of the wonderful conversation, but I'm really excited about the slumber party instead.

Can you tell I'm excited?!?

A meme should be easy to get done, right?

Since I haven't had much time to do a "real" post lately...a meme should be easy (actually editing to say that even this post took me a day and a half to get done...busy, busy, busy!)..., so ok Gretchen, I'll play too: one-word-answers please. Let me know if you're going to do it too. :)

1. Where is your cell phone? pocket


2. Your significant other? reliable


3. Your hair? twisted


4. Your mother? challenge


5. Your Father? forgiven


6.. Your favorite thing? helping


7.Your dream last night? none


8. Your favorite drink? Dr. Pepper


9. Your dream/goal? heaven


10. The room you're in? ISS


11. Your fear? incompletion


12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? closer


13. Where were you last night? game


14. What you're not? shy


15. Muffins? chocolate


16. One of your wish list items? ipod


17. Where you grew up? Texas


18. The last thing you did? teach


19. What are you wearing? jeans!!


20. Your TV? old


21. Your Pets? messy


22. Your Computer? essential


23.Your life? amazing


24. Your mood? satisfied


25. Missing someone? Grandpa


26. Your car? blue


27. Something you're not wearing? earrings (and I have to say I hate that I forgot them today!!!)


28. Favorite Store? Kohl's


29. Your summer? HOT


30. Your favorite color? purple


31. When is the last time you laughed? today


32. Last time you cried? Thursday


33. FOUR PLACES I GO OVER AND OVER: Work, Grocery Store, Sonic Drive In, Taco Bell


34. FOUR OF MY FAVORITE FOODS: Mexican, pasta, brownies, fresh veggies


35. FOUR PLACES I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW: Nashville, The Ozarks, Paris (France, not Texas), Hawaii